One of the most challenging things for parents who are going through a divorce is ensuring that their children are still able to thrive. Child custody exchanges are one of the most stressful times for the children, but it’s one that the parents can have a major impact on.
Even a short handoff can be difficult on a child if they have to deal with their parents arguing. If they hear their parents arguing, they may feel pressure from the conflict. One harsh comment or a cold tone is all it might take for the children to feel like they’re responsible for the conflict.
Focus on predictability
Parents should have a clear plan for exchange day. This includes knowing all the logistical aspects of the day. It’s also beneficial if both parents know what the child should bring with them and any special instructions they have.
Show up on time
Children who know their parents will be on time will likely feel less stressed. This also helps to keep the rest of the day on track, which is particularly important for younger children. If either parent will be late, they should communicate with the other parent as soon as they know there will be an issue.
Leave discussions for another time
Nothing contentious should be discussed during a child custody exchange. Instead, parents should keep the focus on getting the child and their belongings from one parent to the other. Any issues that need to be discussed can be covered later when the children aren’t around.
A parenting plan is the cornerstone of the parenting relationship, so it should include the terms that both parents need to know when it comes to exchanges. The plan should be based on what the children need, for obvious reasons.